Podcast call-in!
Gwee and myself are planning another cockcast later this week and we would like to dedicate a section of the cast to “question time”. We’ve already had a couple crop up in the podcast’s comments, but if there is anything else you would like to ask either me or The Gwee concerning Japan, cocks, not ever getting laid, binge drinking and crying oneself to sleep, writing dirty limericks about ex-girlfriends, emailing dirty limericks to ex-girlfriends, Japanese food or Japanese urban legends, then please let us know in the comments below.
I’m also considering a call-in game show entitled “Guess What I’m Hitting My Penis Against No Guess Quicker Blood Blood! Challenge” if people are up for it.
No but seriously, for the next cockcast expect a lot less cock ‘n’ penis-talk (uproarious cheering) and hopefully more stuff about Japan.
Yongfook, do you think your cock is thin enough to put down another man’s urethra, not unlike the thermometer which those women used to rape you?
Jesus Jake, even rude crude “humour” has some limits eh? That was disgusting.
Maybe so, but he’ll still probably answer it though.
Dear Yongfook, when you were still teaching English, please describe all the perverse thoughts you had about those young and innocent girls.
Dear Yongfook, please describe your best masturbation to date. In particular discuss: grip, lotion, porn, stance, lighting and music.
Dear Yongfook, I suffer frequently from erectile dysfunction. How have you solved this? In particular, does anal stimulation help?
Dear Yongfook, the woman of my dreams has broken my heart, considering you have a lot of experience being made fun of by women (due to various reasons, such as your lack of a big black Haitian cock), what would you suggest as apt payback? So far I’ve just stolen her panties and shoved them down my urethra.
Dear Yongfook, I seem to have a pair of panties and a thermometer stuck in my urethra. What should I do? I’ve tried peanut butter but it’s no good.
Dear Yongfook, I seem to have a pair of panties, a thermometer, a fishing hook and a spring stuck in my urethra. I’m hesitant to try anything else until further advice.
Dear Yongfook, I seem to have a pair of panties, a broken thermometer, a fishing hook and a spring stuck in my urethra, which is currently stuck in a duck’s anal orifice. I really need help here.
Dear Yongfook, why did we never have a food review about the taste of your girlfriends?
Dear Yongfook, shall I help you write some PHP code to implement a maximum of posts from an IP address during a limited timespan?
Dear Yongfook, what would be the best way to star as a guest on your podcast? I have much experience with cock that I would like to share. So far I’ve tried asking intelligent questions, any other suggestions?
what DID you do with those puppies and what’s your favourite thai sexline?
Q: Japanese beer - how’s the beer over there? I drink a lot of stout, so I wonder, do they tend to serve darker/stronger beers or is it mostly ales and lagers? I’ve never seen a Japanese-branded stout, porter, IPA or anything like that, but it makes sense they would not bother importing them to The States. We’ve got tons of regional breweries, micros, and the likes, so the market for Japanese beers is kind of small (outside of Japanese restaurants).
What are you doing with all the baby seal skins?
GREAT IDEA -GLAD I THOUGHT OF IT!! Question No. 1 (for males and females): To shave or not to shave. That is the question. As a woman, I prefer baby smooth balls - don’t want any hair to deal w/ when I’m doing my business. If you’re unfortunate enough to have a hairy ass - get it WAXED. But how about the guys - what’s their preference (I am always “Brazilianed”) 2. Any sly ways of not swallowing? Personally, i hold the gunk in the side of my cheek and let it dribble out on the bed clothing-so much nicer than just pulling off and letting it fly and much less yucky than swallowing. So Jon-are these the types of questions you’re looking for or do you want more highbrow stuff? or middle of the road - like: a recent study shows 40 to 50% of all college kids in the US have the herpes II virus - most of them completely unaware they are infected. If you tested positive for the virus, assuming you’d be smart enough to use condoms during intercourse, would you be willling to use a mouth condom for oral sex (in case you don’t know, herpes II virus lies dormant in the body forever and can be spread even when not symptomatic). Or - as most do - would you throw caution to the wind in the hope that you or your partner are not infected? Are these the types of questions you’re looking for - or would you rather have funny, meaningless ones? pls someone answer
What’s your favourite alcohol? And would you ever try Everclear?
There once was a Brit, half Chinese Claims his cock is as big as a flea’s My rebuttal’s not subtle Don’t leave me befuddled SEND ME PROOF, 8 by 10, if you please.
What do you think of Malaysian(Chinese) girls?
Yongfook, why live in Japan when you could get more girls in America and Britain?
How many times have you seriously thought about closing or discontinuing your website? And your reasons for wanting or not wanting too.
Boxers or briefs?
Who can drink who under the table. My money is on Gwee. No wait… Yongfook does have British blood in him. I say alcoholic Thunderdome! Two men enter…
What is your must loved and loathed thing about Jap girls??
Where’s the super-secret Eurasian Clan meeting going to be held this year?
Must we wear the nija suits this time?
Also, how many times have you been compared to keanu reeves?
Out of the night came a terrible scream, who put the sand in Yongfook’s vaseline?
Whats the most embarressing thing that you have done/has happened to you?
Are you going to live in Japan forever? And why?
raises hand would be fun to try XD
question: is it true that the streets of harajuku is filled with pretty pretty gothlolis? I want gothlolis!
kuzco: same with every other girl in taiwan and china: 5 on a scale of 10
Good. Lord.
why not try to goatse your bf while you’re at it?
or get him into a threesome with a bisexual bodybuilder
notacreature: please describe yourself. Height? Build? Sex? Hair colour? etc…etc…Enquiring minds need to know….
[what’s the big deal? (altho I did it once w/ a bf w/ my finger w/ a rubber on it - he loved it - but when I pulled my finger out, there was a big hole ripped through the rubber by my longish nail and shit was under my nail. That was pretty gross. But- come on - NEVER NEVER ANAL SEX????]
Thats friggin nasty folks. Its just not natural to stick you pee pee into a poo hole, like it isn’t natural to ejaculate onto a miniature baby elephant. But hey, whatever turns you on…..
As much as I disapprove of (only) the telling of notacreature’s story, I think it is quite natural to stick your pee pee into any hole that it might fit in.
including the ones in pumpkins?
Let’s me modest why don’t we.
Oh, and oh, oh oh, what’s the pencil test?
I think it’s refering to that awesome website goatse or something. I cant’ remember. I’ve subconsciously deleted it from my memory. Do a google search for goatse.
Cheers for the explanation of the pencil test. I guess I fail.
Dear Yongfook,
I was wondering if you’ve had the chance to spend appreciable time in Kyoto, and if so could you explain how you stop yourself from suiciding whilst stuck in the cement canyons of the wasteland that is Tokyo?
What’s a nubian?
Dear Sam, are you the same sam I know? (you’ll know from my name if you are)
oh, and I believe, though i’m deffinately not an expert on the matter but am a student of anthropology and know limited knowledge about japanese culture, that the hostess is an extension of Geisha. Yongfook if you disagree please rebute. It seems although geisha has obviously lost cultural popularity the need for a host of sorts is still very much in demand. I’ve seen the show you wrote about and it seems that japanese men are growing a taste for Western Women and it would only seem logical that western women are gaining popularity as hostesses.
Waita minute, isn’t the pencil test just a euphemism for the teeny-tighty-titty test?
notacreature: you have me curious, are you still in college? If so, what are you majoring in? Age? (Nice little ditties of poems you wrote…)
I’d just like to know what other methods other than chronic alcoholism you’ve both developed for not going insane.
>Makusu-little tits, big tits, they can all hang. One can only pass a pencil test if your breasts stand at attention and say hello >Joe-college/psych/comm.
Ok- regarding the pencil test- Unless your boobs are fake, if they are significantly large, then they’re never going to pass the pencil test. How do I know this? because despite being a perfectly fine weight and size, I wouldn’t have been able to “pass the pencil test” since I was about 15.
Well,
Hello then!
This is what we need more of, booby talk. Not that cock stuff.
Pencil test is only relevant up to a certain breast size; perhaps a “B” cup. However, Zedstar is correct about larger breasts. Another factor that will impact the pencil test is tissue density. Some women have higher densities than others; which will move the tipping point of the pencil test higher. As a woman ages, the density proportion of muscle and fibrous tissues decreases while the adipose portion increases. Hence, the sagging effect of later years which afflicts all women and some men with enlarge breasts.
Google Goatse babe…then seek counselling…
Joe- You’re awesome. The fact that you know about the actual composition of breasts is just BRILLIANT. And yeah- a C cup would be fine, but if you’re higher than that (as I have been since I was 15), then you’re not going to pass the test. And Joe’s right about the breast composition and the way the breast changes. The fibrous tissue does change to fatty tissue with age (and I didn’t get the “facts” from a textbook- I worked in a medical practice and learnt a fair bit about the human body from that).
Regarding ‘Cup’ sizes, now a days, there’s cup size ‘inflation’ from bra manufacturers. If you go back 20 years ago, a ‘C’ cup was about the size of a ‘D’ cup today. This was a marketing gamble various marketers did to make women feel better about themselves to sell more of their product.
notacreature: regarding the ‘C’ size, I have seen young women with very high breast tissue density that would allow them pass the so called pencil test you mentioned. I have also seen ‘C’ cup young women who failed the pencil test. I stand by my comments above. I suggest you do a bit more in depth medical research on breast tissue densities.
Thanks Zedstar. Well, in my various lines of work I need to be extremely well versed in a broad range of subjects. In addition, on my side of my family, the medical profession dominates; lots of my cousins, uncles, and aunts are surgeons, doctors etc. (I am also involved in the advertising profession to know about the changes on how women’s lingerie marketing has changes in the last decade on a subtle level unaware by the retail customer. Remember in media advertising there is the obvious message and the hidden message.) My two cents.
any idea when is this new “cockcast” going up?
What do you think of those fake-tanned, blond “gyaru”? Actually, what are they?
I think I’m one.
Dear Yongfook, Firstly, I want to thank you so much for interacting with your fans. You have improved and you’re not as conceited. =D COOL. WHOOPIE
hello yongfook,
would you consider renting a dutch wife?
http://www.wordpress.tokyotimes.org/index.php?p=376
Great idea Paul Tan! Sure beats “Palmala” Anderson and her five sisters…..
Makusu : “Also, how many times have you been compared to Keanu Reeves?” It’s not my question to answer, but my guess is ZERO. don’t help him flatter himself, makusu.
Smathsu Robbins, Judging from your blurryberry, I’d say one fifteen of a trunk indeed? Never so, spam kadouka you’ll never know, but if a flapjack’s worth of question to consider, don’t proffer any barbs too loosely.
Who inspires you?
Why don’t you put ads on your site, you could make a bit of money.
What do you miss about good ol’ Blighty?
If you could change your voice, who would you sound like?