YOU LOVE IT YOU SLAGS
3 short reviews. Apologies to those who prefer words to video. A wordy review is in the works. In the meantime, watch this you mothers:
http://www.yongfook.com/movies/beersnacks2.mov
CHAAAAAZZZ.
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I read this post and something tingled in my underwear.
You need a comb?
After thorough examination the answer is no.
Do not be fooled by this undead Yongfook posing as an un-undead Yongfook. Who will join my party to set free Yongfook’s soul? We’ll need Protection from Undead scrolls, some healing potions, lubricant and lots of condoms.
Awesome video. What’s the name of the good beer?
To solve your problem of not having enough sex (aka none at all) why not have a Yongfook convention and invite all your readers since everybody here would like to have sex with you.
You and barnyard animals.
quite small, but still still relatively satisfying.
Let me tell you, he’s got that bit down.
Wouldn’t an implosion go the other way?
I was all set to fly to Tokyo and have sex with you under swirling tendrils of incense.
The belch kind of canceled out my desire, though. Still, it’s wonderful to get a full 15 minutes of that luscious voice of yours. Will you read me bedtime stories? Hell, you could read a phone book and I’d lap it up like double Devon cream.
Wonderful video. Not enough visible penises.
silly guy [:
mm crunchies.
You somehow fooled me into watching 10 minutes of you eating “crisps” while I was looking for a food review. You must be some kind of maniacal genius bear or something. And might I suggest that the easiest way to eat Baby Star Ramen is, perhaps, while it is still in its baby form?
Oh, and for all you people with your name linked to your blog, whats the point if you don’t have a picture of yourself so that I can check if you’re a hot girl?
I know! It’s like, what, I have to “get to know” you first before you send me a pic? What if you’re a total uggo, then I’ll just feel all cheated.
his name is ‘uncle karl’ you slob!
who, Guigg? He’s your uncle? Or is that what he makes you call him.
Uncle Curl, you twit! How many fucking times…
no guigg likes to be called other things!
the guy on the chip/crisp packet - he hangs out with frogs and deers and the big buddha near kamakura- his name is uncle karl and they are karl chips!
go make your futon - that might help in your attempts to attract prospective partners? or you could maybe wear sandwich boards? hand out tish at your local station with your details in the pack? put your food reviews on the various advertising video screens around shinjuku?
Fuck you all. No need pictures. I’m hot. ‘Nuff said.
On the other hand, H looks hot. Is that even your REAL picture?
H are you bi? Oh goddamnit….. you have a boyfriend? Whatever. If you do it with a girl it’s not cheating.
goddamit, baby star ramen is just mamee for japanese!
http://www.mamee.com/Product/Snack/export/cracker.htm
oi! lay off the koreans!
The secret to eating baby star ramen without dropping it all over the floor is….
(whisper) don’t talk when you are trying to eat it ;)
Y’know… Potato chips are chips made from potatoes… so if that guy on the Karl Chips bag is actually Karl, then those chips are actually chips made from …?? Ewwww…. You ate Karl!!!???
oh. then the pics are in the mail :D
hahaha. I quite enjoyed that review. That belch was impressive too considering it was only from snacks and not even a full Asahi. and I’m with Evelyn on your voice.. oh baby.
send me your picture fuckstress haha. yea that was me a while ago. 2 1/2 years ago. and thanks youre sweet :D
Karl, eh? Huh..too bad it’s not available in this country.
Isn’t it funny how around here, most ppl burn incense when they’re smoking weed to camouflage the smell? Never thought Incense could be considered as a chick-magnet.
Lacking casual sex?? There’s always a (temporary) way out, sweet sweet YongFook. Rumor has it that if you want to have it done right, you should just go ahead and do it yourself. To you, from you, by you.
Am I the only person who visits this site who doesn’t want to penetrate Jon?
I’m starting to feel the peer pressure a little.
you don’t want to shag me?
opens mouth, points and lets out a bloodcurdling scream, a la Body Snatchers
andyheather: urm.. i’m thinking more along the lines of visitors wanting to BE penetrated rather than penetrate Jon.. But then again, you may be right if his fan base mainly consists of horny gay guys..
you should try the bbq-fish type baby star, I dunno what to think of them! curry ones are quite nice though, even if they do taste like dry roasted peanuts at times.
Call me Mr Unadventurous, but I would much rather watch Jon review the crazy-bastard Japanese food I will be ’subsisting’ off of in a coupla months time, than to engage in any giving or receiving of danglies. I’m clearly unwelcome here, but fuck it. I’m finishing my coffee. There are basic freedoms.
Stares blankly at the camera for a full minute, blinking occasionally, a la Kitano
U r hot! U ought to be in (gay porn) movies!
why not have full frontal nude food reviews whereby u play with yourself on your bed with no clothes on, and all the while blabbing a review. yeah yeah!!
hey YF, your lips have been featured on http://minishorts.net there goes your rep !! lol
assortment of snakcs and alcoholic beverages - $20 overpriced hairstyle that makes YF look like a wanker - $100 useless incense that doesn not attract females, two-legged or four - $15 extremely gay shirt that makes YF look like a Backstreet Boy- priceless
actually the snacks and beer only cost about $5.
That’s a new way to pimp oneself out - post video clip on own wildly popular blog to exploit E-List netceleberity status.
Except that the video clip sorta looks like an extended dating agency video in which ALL the things they tell you not to any, any, any account do save if you’ve either had a full frontal lobotomy or don’t ever wish to have sex* again or reproduce ever again except as anonymous sperm donor #5873. *NB: Penetrative intercourse or otherwise with small mammals, manatees and left and right hands doesn’t count as sex. Even if the left hand feels like someone else.
Can’t tell if Yong Fook is ahead of the game since any girl that will still shag him AFTER watching said video clip must have caught a case of true love in much the same way Annabel Chong’s caught a case of the clap - quite easily.
i don’t believe i fucking watched the entire moronic thing
whats all this hoohah abt shagging jon?
yikes. if that’s all the incentive u guys have to visit this site, i think there’s really no need for him to write anything is there?random pics/vids of him burping/eating/rambling/whatever wld have sufficed.
btw,girl e, there’s another way to get ur own hand to feel like another person. it’s called “the stranger”. juz sit on ur hand (either one) long enuf for it to be numb.step 2: proceed to wank senselessly.
o i geddit now. the whole food review thing is a facade, a front, for his ramblings
Is it me or does Yongfook look like Charlie Chaplain … except in color?
i expected to see some thing like some screwed up face while eating chips. and yongfook going ewww wtf is this! i am disappointed to find out that the video had nil entertainment value X_X 7 minutes down the drain.
fellatio, if that is your real name, I fail to see how a screwed up face and saying ewww would provide more entertainment value than seeing a man in an open shirt eating chips. Haven’t you learned from the wonders of reality tv that the mundanity bordering on languor is ever more valuable than slapstick when it comes to entertainment.
On a similar note, if yongfook did look like my idol Charlie Chaplin, the video would not be of yongfook eating Karl’s chips but of me eating yongfook’s curl.
I actually have no idea what that last sentence means.
Despite the opinions of some people on this page, Yongfook, you are a sexy beast. Can I lick you? please? Just a little bit?
Whoa whoa whoa, what’s going ON here. Some people seem to be getting this ass-backwards… Jon’s videos are amazing and should make all the chicks go wild. Don’t diss the videos.
Whoever ‘emancipated’ that ‘girl’ needs to lock her the fuck up again. This unchecked aggression will not stand, man.
My friends tell me I should stop stalking robots & their blogs….. trying to chat them up….. refreshing their webpage every 10 minutes hoping for updates….. fantasising about how they could actually be REAL people if only the blue fairy would grant their wishes to be real little boys….
I should get a life they say. Little do they know… .. I’m a robot too. Sigh.
What the fuck? What the hell are you talking about? Why is there no photo of you on your blog? This is the kind of shit I’m talking about.
Andy
Just pointing out that there are reasons why intelligent and reasonably attractive girls aka Fran (and maybe even myself) might head for the frigging hills at the sight of Jon Anothony Yong Fook Cockle, screaming, “no, no, no, the mutant british snozzcumbers have invaded”.
And this reaction is despite, (hand to the lump of coal that is my heart), his clear and not inconsiderable charms that the world has been privileged to view via the clip. He’s a good looking dude, reasonably intelligent, side splittingly funny and writes bloody well.
The only problem is that with lines he was using on that video, he was oozing pheremones of desperation. And not just at any one girl, to the girls at large on the net. It’s bleedingly, achingly funny, but it also evokes a head-for-the-fucking-hills-as-fast-as-we-can-mentality in any sane, attractive and intelligent female. It’s like the ultimate turnoff for girls who get a fair amount of male attention since a guy becomes just another statisitc in a horde of rabid admirers.
It’s the female perspective, dude, so chill.
Or then again, I might just be misinterpreting his chagrin at eating Kimchi chips for something else. Peace.
I think it’s happened. It’s finally happened.
Someone took me too seriously.
Well done! You get a prize, and that prize is to make out with me, like, totally.
So wait…you DIDN’T stab a fork into your penis?
And whatever man, we all know you use your website to get all your dates. That’s what i use mine for. Although, I started using incense after your video clip…you know…just to hurry things up a bit as more girls start wanting me.
Fuck that Guig. I have no pictures on my website… and for obvious reasons.
I’m an ugly deformed midget with 6 toes.
Yeah, well, what the fuck do you think I’m trying to find, another pretty asian girl? Midgets are what the goddamn internet was built for. Just ask Al Gore. Now you send me pictures, or I go straight to yongfook for that naked set.
6 toes on each foot, or all together? Can you give me a break down?
Sorry Yong Fook.
No intention of making out with you OR taking you seriously.
Nothing personal, I’ve just given up on making out with guys because they pash so horribly I’d rather take a spit bath. And making out these days is boring anyway because I’m always on autopilot. Even with copious, distillary breaking amounts of alcohol.
As to taking you seriously, it’s just that there was something IN the video that I can’t quite articulate - but the net effect made me want to run away, screaming “the chihuahuas of hell are here”.
Good luck with the luring girls to your pad with incense.
damn. bitter? laugh a little woman. /=
I really enjoyed the “It’s the female perspective”-part a few comments up. I didn’t know there was only one of those and that Girl Emancipated was the one who voiced it. Nice. If I wasn’t so tired (it’s monday) I would have liked to state “The Male Perspective” and get the other guys to follow me.
jon has a huge gay following. everyone wants a piece of him. who needs girls? girls are needy. jon: make the switch!
Good god, you actually thought he lit incense hoping to lure in the ladies didn’t you?
Option 1. Irony bypass operation due to complicated toncillectomy
Option 2. American
Option 3. Dumb
don’t get me wrong, hating men is an ancient and noble passtime, I don’t really want to kiss them either. But I do, cos I heard chicks dig a bit of homo acion. Is it true? Is it?
i think we dig the lesbo action more. homo action is hot in the navy.
esply when they only had their little sailor hats on.
Andy:
Er. Yes. I did see the Irony, it’s just that there was a rather sad and desperate note that underlaid the entire exercise. Like he meant it to be wrly, dryly, funny and still tongue in cheek but at the same time hoping against hope that there was a fraction of a chance that his rabid fangirls would beat down his door. To put their tongues in his cheek.
Yes. Anything else?
Anyhow, given that I’m not the raving fangirl that all female readers here are supposed to be and that you, on the other hand, appear to be a raving fanboy, may I assign the equitable interest* in the YongFook awarded prize* to you? On condition that you tape the entire exercise.
There, I got my guy on guy action….which I will so watch.
” You get a prize, and that prize is to make out with me, like, totally.” *YF, you didn’t say anything about the transferability of the prize. I’m afraid that if Andy takes it up, you’re going to have to honour it. ***Other Fanboys/Girls - if you’re willing to make me an offer for the prize, I’d consider - anything above a shoelace is a fair offer.
I’m in love…
girl constipated, i juz like his writings, not his looks. dont think much of that. i like the random comments here as well esply that guig persona. :D
so, please dont add me into the “fangirls who wanna bump uglies with YF until we pass out and puke disgusting japo snacks” category. i rather watch paint dry or my limewire making slowass downloads. thanx :)
I do not think I am a slag, but I certainly do like the video. :-) Keep up the good work.
Guig, dude, one can NEVER have enough pretty asian girls!!
My basement’s only so big, fuckstress.
ok you prick lighting up incense is not goin to help win points with the ladys…betta luck next time buddy…ha haa
I see Guig. Which explains the need for midgets in your party. Why do men always just want to use me for my pitiful battered worned out bukake-covered midget body? Haven’t I suffered enough?!?! WHY?!?!??!
Shit. Look at me. I just can’t stop coming back to talk shit with totally random robots. Need. Life. Pronto.
gigolo iv i know you enjoy the mundanity of yongfook, his open shirt, pants and his sex life but not everyone does =)
I like Jon for his vocabulary. I mean, how awesome it is to say fuck and belch in one line?
i think not all women like incense.. depend on what the scent is.. btw i LOVE star ramen.. those are good…
Hopelessly demented, no life, responders included. Who has time for this drivel. Buy a book or otherwise use your excess time constructively. Pitiful
Loved the reference to hay for humans….hehehihiehehe….
Nearly as good as the carot o’lait video, you definately need more special effects in the next one.
“It’s like the ultimate turnoff for girls who get a fair amount of male attention since a guy becomes just another statisitc in a horde of rabid admirers.
It’s the female perspective, dude, so chill.”
Wow. First, guys don’t really “admire” you as much as they simply undress you with their eyes. Nobody cares about your supposed “intelligence.” But hey, I guess it must be fun to think you’re the end-all, be-all of the opposite sex. Not to mention that you, apparently, speak for all women everywhere.
[…] 18th, 2005 11:20 PM Filed under: general, food, movies, funny I almost can’t believe I just watched a video of a guy drinking beer […]
i think i read yongfook as much for the reader comments as well…
you guys rock la, makes time fly.
stuff the sunflower seeds and healthy rice crackers.
that accent is so sexy it will make me eat anything weird thing out of Japan.. but seeing i’m in Melbourne, yes Down under Australia, i’m limited by the range of Japo junk food.. yeah maybe some ‘Colon’ or ‘Pockys’ (you’ll be amaze by the games you can play with them).
Jon, do continue talking, that accent of yours just makes me go all.. ? …. frustrated? ahhhh? U r so bonkable, if u were here, i would pay you in Australian junk food, how does a deep fried Mars bar sound to u?
I enjoyed it. It was a bit like a clip from the travel and living channel, except gut wrenchingly honest.Thumbs up.
Ah…so youre half singaporean? That explains why you can make references to authentic curries and ramadhan and actually know what youre talking about…
I’m an eurasian myself ( irish + malay ) living in Kuala Lumpur. Always a treat to meet another!
Cute. Amusing. A bit narcissistic, but that’s to be expected from a blog. Altogether rather entertaining…I must be bored senseless to say that. 4/5
I’d suggest more confidence in the dating scene, but I expect you’re not as hopeless at you let on.
Hello kiddies,
When you get over the youthful yongfook and want a real man, complete with beard, towel tie and a frog on me shoulder, why not come and visit uncle karl at me homepage?!
I don’ t know how I found your blog…well, I know, I was searching for “hyaku en shop” and…nothing…I’m here… BUT, the point is that I don’t know you, Ihave never read your blog…I just saw your video…and I would like to know why do all the people here want to fuck you even if you seems so silly? Who cares if you have incense in your room if you belch like this? …But, anyway, it was not so bad… :)
Just to let you know that I think the website is great and I wish you all of the best for the future. http://carisoprodol.gottaoh.com
You’re a snarky, narcissisistic bastard and i love you!!! Haha. My best friend and i are huge fans, and i’m wondering if in 2 years you’ll be rich and famous and need your own Executive Pastry Chef. If you do look me up. I graduate culinary school in 2 years. Keep up the whole video review thing. ja’ne-ami